Open menu count

“How many open menus?” The cook asks.

“Nine,” my boss reports.

“In German or in English?” The cook says.

“English!”

“Fuck!” The cooks say.

Support staff

I gave myself a promotion today. There is no such role as ‘lead support’, but there is now because I have filled the position. 

Milkshake

Someone looked me dead in the eye and told me their milkshake was too creamy.

At this point, I don’t even know.