Virgin mimosas

There is no such thing as a “virgin mimosa”, it’s just orange juice at that point.

Overzealous customers

I’ve heard it all, but this is especially tiring: “Can I do dishes instead of pay my bill?” 

“NO!” I wish I could say. I just laugh.

Family Day

Nearing the end of a busy Family Day, a cook was mad, shouting out, “Go home and be with your families!”

Supports are bussers, hosts, and cashiers. This support asked me how much I sold on my serving shift. I told him. “I’m going to need you to start selling more or I’m not going to be able to give you these serving shifts,” he joked, pretending he was my boss.

Sarcasm

“Are you here to work?” I asked my kitchen manager.

“No, I’m here for moral support,” he replied.

Bon appetite!

Yesterday, our expo (my coworker) ran my food. I went up to him, “Hey! Did you say bon appetite to my table after you dropped off my food?” I hounded him.

You’re fired!

13 years ago, I got fired from Broadway. 

The boss who fired me works at my restaurant now.

I want to ask if I can fire him.